a public idiot out of yourself in one night or do fifty stupid things in one year that only you knew about

If you had to choose between making a public idiot out of yourself in one night or do fifty stupid things in one year that only you knew about, what would you choose?

Me personally, I would rather commit fifty stupid things that only I knew about. The stupid things in life that you do, you regret right away. As time goes on, you look back on those memories and laugh at yourself. You try to think of the reasons for doing what you did, but your mind goes blanket. Life is all about doing things in the moment. If you don’t ever do things you wouldn’t normal do or be spontaneous, what great memories would you create? Though they say to think before you act, acting before you think is more of an adventure. Sometimes things don’t play out the way you'd hope they would, but that's life. 

Making an idiot of myself in public is something I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to do. Doing such acts to resemble myself as a fool is different when there's a crowd. People will be aware of what you did whether you want them to forget it or not. The thought of you being a fool will sit in the back of their minds. In this world, people are judged for anything you can think of. You will be teared down and picked apart for making a fool of yourself. But you can’t be teared down if you stand tall. If you are able to disregard the comments people make towards you, making an idiot out of yourself doesn’t seem so bad. Unless you’re like me. I stand tall but slowly start to crumble and after awhile, I fall. 

Nobody has the same opinion on everything and that’s normal. Some would agree with my reasoning for doing fifty idiotic things rather than being a public humiliation, others would not. It all comes down to how you deal with the weight of the world and what you let get to you. I am not capable of embracing the things that would be said about me if I were a public humiliation like some people are able to do. I’d be happier knowing that the fifty foolish acts I did where safe with me. If I ever wanted to share those moments, I’d be able to. This way I pick and choose what the world knows about me.